A Little Slice Of Heaven In 2011?

     This year I did a lot of early morning driving. At 0600 on Talk 650 KFBK, 2 male voices would come over the radio. During their show opening one of them would say “It is (insert date here), and a little slice of heaven in 2011”. (Or something like that). When I heard this at o’dark hundred as I headed to another long day, I had to laugh because nothing could be more opposite. Looking back on 2011, however, there were a few slices of heaven.

        My brother and I reached two huge milestones this year. After being told by those around him multiple times he would never graduate High School, my little brother graduated. The pride I felt for him is immeasurable. The pleasure I felt in him proving all those ignoramuses wrong still glows bright. The lesson? Don’t ever tell anyone they can’t do something because they might prove you wrong and then you are the butthole. Especially someone who has God on their side…

                I myself managed somehow to graduate nursing school. Not only that, a few weeks later I passed the board exam. I don’t think I have ever had a more petrifying experience.  Through God’s grace I was given a job at an area hospital in the exact unit I wanted. For me, 2011 meant entering into adulthood. In some respects, 2011 has been my hardest year yet.

2011 also had wonderful times for me. 2 weeks camping in Yosemite Valley with friends and family was my favorite highlight. Being a volunteer nurse at Leoni Meadows Summer camp was very full circle as well. My family was safe, healthy, and I never missed a meal. My car worked, my bed was soft, I had hot water to shower, and an electric toothbrush with plenty of toothpaste. While this year was challenging, I never went without comforts that others across the globe never have. I don’t know what it means to be in total survival mode. I am truly thankful for that.

For me, 2012 will mean getting familiar with this new world of adulthood. It will mean making the transition from student to professional. It will mean learning to stretch my wings, but also how to handle life in the big bad world. It will mean developing a thicker skin, and learning to deal with people when they are their worst and lashing out. On a global level, 2012 means more uncertainty. The future is unknown, and things we don’t know scare us. I will continue to find peace in family and friends that truly have my back, and a God that already has my ultimate future secured.

Good-bye 2011. Welcome 2012. Let the adventure begin…

Christmas time is here…

During nursing school, I did a rotation on the mother baby unit. I am not a mother, and I had only ever babysat ages 4 months older and up.  I knew that newborn babies were fragile, but until I actually was there the few moments after birth I never realized how delicate they are. We monitor their temperature in a way we don’t dream of in adults. Their tiny little bodies can’t handle any extremes in environment.

Then we read the Christmas story. Christmas bends all human logic. The idea of a supreme being brings images of ultimate power. You look at many other religions and you come across stories of gods who are frightening and selfish. Frankly speaking, when you come across the story of the Christian God, you come across an odd story. An all powerful deity reincarnating as a helpless baby? Crazy. A powerful deity reincarnating as a helpless baby to POOR people? To people that would birth him in a freaking barn? Insane.

I love Christmas. I love the Christmas story. I really do love the lights that you spend hours stringing on wobbly ladders, the carols you hear over and over again, and the 600 calorie Starbucks drinks. My childhood was a great one, and my mom and dad made Christmas magical. Yes, I did believe in Santa. No, I didn’t somehow get scarred for life. I left brownies and hot tea for the man in red, and I did hear sleigh bells in the snow. I have been known to lie myself under a Christmas tree and stare at the lights.

I love Christmas because at its core is hope. It is the reminder that there is peace available to those that want it. It is a time where we can hit the reset button after a long year of stress and remember why it is we are even on this planet. I would like to end this post with a scene from my favorite Christmas movie “A Charlie Brown Christmas”. A movie in which our dear Charlie Brown is surrounded by commercialism, pushed to utter frustration, and finally straightened out by Linus.

 

“ISN’T THERE ANYONE WHO KNOWS WHAT CHRISTMAS IS ALL ABOUT??”

“Sure Charlie Brown, I can tell you what Christmas is all about. *Linus walks out to center stage*    Lights please!

‘And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying, Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men!’

That’s what Christmas is all about Charlie Brown”

I truly wish you a Merry Christmas.

Heigh ho, Heigh ho, it's off to work i go...

    I feel totally amazed how many messages, comments, text messages, and voice mails I have gotten asking how the new job is going. I want to say thank you! I also decided to write a little blurb about how it is going rather than try and get to you all. Yes, I am lazy.

    It sucks to be a new registered nurse. There is nothing fun about it. I have never been this “deer in the headlights” before and you all know how I hate deer. ;) This is not to say I am unsafe. If anything I have an issue of being too cautious. So far I have spent an entire 4 shifts on the actual unit doing nurse things. (A week was spent orienting to the company and learning to play nice with others so that is why it seems like it should be more.) 4 days isn’t a lot of time to be anywhere let alone a busy cardiac unit and I am trying to cut myself some slack. I didn’t get this far by being kind to myself, so it is a new skill I am trying to learn on top of everything else.

    I was told nursing school doesn’t and can’t prepare you for the real world. It is truth! I didn’t realize how much as students you hide behind your RN, but you do. When are granted the initials RN behind your name, suddenly you are supposed to magically be more knowledgeable from when you were a student. Yeah….no.I am thankful for the unit I am working on. There is an assortment of cranky people just like anywhere else, but I have found others that are ready and willing to help me.

    Learning to step into more responsibility is hard. Change is hard. Employment is hard. I have never had “real” employment before. I have always been the nanny or the summer camp counselor. Never have I had to clock in on time or face real consequences. I am looking forward to finally seeing my first paycheck. Payday is this Friday, and I am excited to see why exactly it is I get out of bed at 4:30am.

    Overall, it is change overload. It is new experience overload. I am trying to roll with it as best I can, but I have had my moments. I am learning to accept that this time in my life is just inherently tough. That being a new nurse just…sucks.

Say a prayer for me…

Post-Thanksgiving Ramblings

    Tis Thanksgiving weekend. I suppose this is when I should regale you with the many things I am thankful for. I presume I should also remind you how awesome it is to live in the United States vs. most other places in the world. I don’t really feel like doing that, however, because as a fairly intelligent person reading this post I think you can figure it out. The big things in life are easy to be thankful for (i.e. jobs, houses, food, family, etc), but what about the small things?

    As a nurse, I am thankful for an electronic medication administration program with bar codes that keeps me from messing up so easy. As a hiker, I am thankful for water purifiers. As a runner, I am thankful for synthetic “dri-fit” T-shirts.  As a fanatic reader, I am thankful for LED book lights. As a woman, I am thankful for Bradley Cooper.

    The actual Thanksgiving day was fabulous, and I ran/walked the “Run to Feed the Hungry” in Sacramento with 27,000 of my best friends. I did eat myself into a food coma that afternoon, but I think that is partly the point of the holiday. Instead of shopping on black Friday or even sleeping off said food coma, I made money.  It was not a workday I ever want to repeat. I earned every penny.

    Christmas season is here and that makes me crazy happy. I will one day be that neighbor that has their house so decked out in Christmas lights you can see it from space. Oh, and it will be synced to various tunes from the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. This year, however, my current residence is more modestly decorated. This year...

    Finally, as I sit here with a full stomach of Thanksgiving leftovers, I am thankful for the fact I ran today…

Who is this Felicia person who rambles?

The Many Ramblings of Felicia

I am Felicia. I am Irish. This alone should explain why I ramble. I am also a registered nurse. I am proud of this fact and constantly humbled by this fact. I have just started a job as a telemetry (cardiac) nurse at a very posh hospital in the Sacramento Region. I am dealing with moments of sheer terror on a regular basis at the moment and getting paid for it. Good times.

I love to write. Be an author? Not something on high on my priority list. I think it is more important for me to focus on studying what to do for 3^rd degree heart block right now. I am at a time in my life, however, when I want an outlet to write about the random things that happen to me. I find it relaxing. That is what this blog will be used for. Welcome to the many ramblings of Felicia….